Journal

At the start of the week, I asked a question. Who wrote the rules you’re living by? If you missed last week’s chapter, Who Wrote the Rules You’re Living By?, I’d encourage you to begin there, as it explores how the invisible rules that shape our lives are formed in the first place. If…

There are moments in life that quietly change the way we see ourselves. Not because something dramatic happens, but because someone asks us a different question. So let me ask you one. Who wrote the rules you’re living by? Not the laws that govern society. The invisible ones. The ones that quietly shape your…

If you’ve ever felt as though you’re losing yourself, I wonder whether anyone has ever suggested something different. Perhaps you’re not losing yourself at all. Perhaps you’re grieving. Not necessarily the loss of a person, or a relationship, or a career, but the version of you who learnt how to survive. Because becoming isn’t…

We live in a world that celebrates busy. Ask someone how they are, and the answer is almost always the same, ‘Busy’. It’s become a badge of honour. A sign that we’re needed. Successful. Important… Driven. At some point, we’ve quietly started measuring the value of our lives by how full our calendars became.…

There comes a point in many women’s lives when what once made them successful begins to make them feel stuck. They’ve done everything they were supposed to do; worked hard, successfully relied upon, put everyone else first, kept the peace and held everything together. From the outside, it often looks as though they’re coping,…

We have become a generation that reaches for advice almost instinctively. Before making a decision, we search. We ask strangers on the internet what career to pursue. We listen to podcasts about relationships while driving to work. We save Instagram posts we’ll probably never read again. We watch thirty-second videos promising to change our…

At sixteen years old, I was asked what I wanted to do for the rest of my life. Sixteen. I couldn’t legally buy a bottle of wine, vote, drive or get a tattoo and I had absolutely no idea what a pension was, but yet somehow, I was considered mature enough to make decisions…

The hardest person I ever learnt to disappoint was everyone else. For years, I thought I was kind. Easy-going. Considerate. The sort of person who got on with everyone. I listened more than I spoke. I smiled when I disagreed. I softened my opinions. I laughed things off. I became incredibly good at reading…

If procrastination were an Olympic sport, I’d have won gold at certain stages throughout my life. Honestly, if I needed to learn a new skill, start something unfamiliar or put myself out there in a way I’d never done before, I’d suddenly become incredibly busy. ‘I’ll do it once I’ve finished this…’‘I just need…

Everyone prepares you for giving birth, but nobody prepares you for becoming someone new. You can read every book, listen to every podcast and attend every antenatal class. Your midwife will prepare you for the physical side of birth; the growing bump, the hospital bag, the birth plan (which, in my case, never saw…